I Was Walking Thru Hoops and I tripped

End of Summer 23

September 7th , 2:22 pm

A boiling climate waits for me on the street, and I get a text that my work is canceled for the day. My nerves jump when I think of the financial loss, but I start to breathe and accept the opportunity to slow down for a few hours. I hit a covid test to see if I can make it a week. While the test is buffering I think about why writing feels so good. Thoughts come out as words and I love to edit them so they're not too esoteric or emo. A friend told me years ago that they edit down all of their poetry to the fullest extent as a stylistic choice, and that really stuck with me. My dad is an editor and I love him very much.

Things in New York City, unfortunately, have been pretty bad. Times have also been hard for most people in the music and arts community. The closure of Chaos Computer in July, the unfathomably expensive cost of living, and the horror movie style militarization of the police department has left myself and many others feeling fragile as hell, and a little unhinged. Lots of homies dying, friendships ending, the whispers of new disease and bacteria in the ocean that attacks your flesh… it feels commonplace to acknowledge how bad things are, and how desperately we need a change.

My cousin once asked me what actually differentiates DIY spaces like CC, The Glove, Heck, Silent Barn, Shea Stadium (etc) from every other quasi-legal, publicly operated music venue. Why go to all the trouble, isn't the effect ultimately the same? At the time I was stoned and pretty surprised to hear someone question something so personally sacred and tied to my identity, a wordless understanding. I think I landed somewhere like “You can do what you want there, like there's less rules” - barely even scratching the surface. I think of when CC first opened, the rush of energy and excitement from faces old and new, people literally in tears over the promise of a new DIY space, however temporary. The ones who treated it like a church, pulling up to every show they could, bringing condiments for the free rice and whatever party favors they could fit in their bag. Watching artists hone their practice within the space, building networks of support along the way. The heroic feeling of climax and completeness during our final week, similar the Glove's, and the explosion of that energy felt all around the city in the weeks following. Even if it was hard for me to define in that moment, the difference and purpose is boundless to the point of being overwhelming.

Photo by @escobat

I think it comes down to the Construction of our Future Histories. Building a show from the ground up, curating a particular environment and activating a vision without any middleman imposing their expectations on it, presenting art to young people who had no idea such a space could exist and older people who never thought it would be possible again… embrace the drama and the romance. In the wake of CC and 538 closing there's been an uptick of generator shows (really since covid, but even more so lately) and one-offs at people's houses and non-venue businesses, all of which leave people joyous and HYPED. It seems like coloring outside the margins is truly more satisfying for most us, even when it takes mad work and going out of pocket. We come together and make it happen, and enjoy the satisfaction that WE DID THAT, rather than oh yeah that was a great show - it's a community effort. I'm sure some people will read this and roll their eyes, so I'll lean into it more: THIS IS WORK THAT MATTERS. Generating profit for people who never show up, shamelessly embracing capitalism and clout currency, even as a means of survival, will never make an impact on people's lives in the same way. But these are hard times in NYC, and we have to work with what we got.

So here's some Future History:

Lifeworld, a beloved DIY space with a focus on underground comedy and performance art, is set to close on Sept 15th. I feel lucky to have played a couple shows there, and although I wasn't around much, it's clear to me that Lifeword fostered a tight community around its programming and upkeep, and filled a much needed void in the comedy and theater scenes. Follow @come.to.life.world and show some love during their final week <3

Brass Orchids II - a reprise of the legendary 2021 generator show that happened deep in the forest of Prospect Park - is going down today at 6pm. Featuring performances by Alex Suarez (aka Cienfuegos), Many Many Girls, Joni and a rare Jack Propane appearance, this is sure to be totally amazing. Msg @ilotnasailuj for coordinates.

September 23rd I'm planning a backyard show with Sweet Baby Jesus in bedstuy, info TBA.

October 23rd doing a noise banger at Hart bar for Alex C and Flesh Narc w/ Neuter, Skinkittenz and more TBA.

Any shows I'm planning or helping out with will be mentioned here for the foreseeable future.

Thanks for reading :’) subscribe for more if you want. Good luck out there!!

-CDY